Hump Day Rules

Wednesday has absolutely become my favorite night of TV. Even over Sunday, even as much as I love "Grey's Anatomy" and "The Sopranos" and "Big Love." And last night's lineup rocked big time.

I kicked it off by watching "America's Next Top Model" live, seeing my favorite, Snaggle-Tooth Joanie, rocking the challenge and the photo shoot. Yay for ex-stripper/preacher's kids! And I fluved Jade's dumb-ass comment of the night: "Shooting with the elephant, it reminds me of an ancient dinosaur, because they are in the dinosaur family."

That was followed by watching "Lost" live, which was about 58 minutes of a really good episode that ended with two minutes of mind-blowing action. Two more potential deaths? Hello, May sweeps!

Then, I flipped over to Bravo to watch "Top Chef," which has quickly become one of my favorite shows of the season. The whole time I was watching it, I just knew that flighty, frenetic Dave would be the one leaving, especially when he chose to cook a black-truffle and cognac mac & cheese. It was quite shocking, then, when the top chefs of Napa liked his dish the best and sent him to the final three with my favorite, Harold. That left Lee Anne and Tiffani, both of whom I've liked from the start. Apparently, Lee Anne had too many flavors going on in her dish, all of which overwhelmed both the truffle and a 2001 Shafer Hillside Select Cabernet, which apparently is some sort of mega-rare and delicious wine. So she got the boot, though she'd displayed impeccable skill throughout. Judge Tom Colicchio sure is pissed about it, too.

Then, I rewound the tape in my living room VCR to watch "The Amazing Race." This used to be my absolute favoritist show evah, but not so much anymore. Last night's was a good episode, but two teams engaged in some really crappy behavior by calling and cancelling two other teams' cabs. Besides, I only like one team that's left in the Top 4. In the old days, it used to be that I would like 3 of the top 4 teams.

After that was "American Idol," in which little Princess Paris got the boot. I liked her, but it was her time to go, especially given that Twitchy Taylor has an inexplicably large fan base and seems destined for the final two. I hate him, by the way. I hate his faux soul mannerisms, his drunken dancing, his better-than-this attitude and his stupid gray hair. I'm resigned to my favorite, Kat McPhee, leaving third, after Elliott but before Chris and Twitchy Taylor.

Then, finally, I could watch "Alias," which felt like an old-school episode, especially with Syd's wonderful Southern accent being used in full force. Then, just as with "Lost," two shocking deaths, one of which finally might have answered the question of whether Sloan is a good guy or a bad guy after all.

After all the adrenaline-amping shows, I wasn't anywhere near tired, so I popped in a screener of "Kathy Griffin: Strong Black Woman," which airs on Bravo next week. (I'll miss screeners almost as much as I miss free CDs.) Her takes on Tom Cruise, K-Fed and, especially, Star Jones shouldn't be missed, particularly when she gets into the whole "Dakota Fanning's in rehab" bit she tried on the red carpet and subsequently got fired for.